Endless Loop 200: American Dream

lcdsoundsystemHave you ever had one of those songs that gets stuck in your head for days…weeks…years? Sure you have. These are the songs that always make the cut. The songs on repeat. We all have them. I have a ton. Welcome back (for one last time) to Endless Loop. “American Dream” by LCD Soundsystem And just like that, I’m 40 years old. Now, I’m not one of those people that’s terrified of getting older, panicking as the sand grains fall faster and faster through the hourglass.  I don’t feel a midlife crisis coming on.  There are no convertible sportscars or barely legal mistresses or fad drug addictions in my immediate future.  But there is still something almost mythically daunting about that number.  And I don’t really know why. Aging is like this weird thing that you can see and you can certainly feel, but that somehow still doesn’t [more]

Endless Loop: Staying Alive

cursiveHave you ever had one of those songs that gets stuck in your head for days…weeks…years? Sure you have. These are the songs that always make the cut. The songs on repeat. We all have them. I have a ton. Welcome back to Endless Loop. “Staying Alive” by Cursive I have started and stopped and started and stopped writing this article about a dozen times now, mind blank and an unending stream of words erased parading in front of my eyeballs.  I start from one angle, then abandon it and begin again from another only to abandon it as well.  I change my song choice.  Start over.  Come back at it again.  Start over.  Change the song again.  Start over.  Come back to the original song.  Blank.  Blank.  Blank. I start to write about my kids, get halfway down the page, and realize the whole thing’s a [more]

Endless Loop: Freedom! ’90

georgemichaelHave you ever had one of those songs that gets stuck in your head for days…weeks…years? Sure you have. These are the songs that always make the cut. The songs on repeat. We all have them. I have a ton. Welcome back to Endless Loop. “Freedom! ‘90” by George Michael I think for a lot of folks my age (nearing 40), George Michael played a significant, or at least a partial roll in our collective sexual awakening, be it the young girls who thought he was hot, the young, gay boys who felt the same way, along with a kinship they may or may not have only subconsciously been aware of, and the kids like me who liked to ogle the supermodels the artist frequently had star in his music videos.  It didn’t matter who or what you were, straight, gay, or bisexual, male or female, [more]

Endless Loop: Midnight Cowboy

midnightcowboyHave you ever had one of those songs that gets stuck in your head for days…weeks…years? Sure you have. These are the songs that always make the cut. The songs on repeat. We all have them. I have a ton. Welcome back to Endless Loop. “Midnight Cowboy” by John Barry This week’s tune for my soon to be concluding column is “Midnight Cowboy,” John Barry’s theme song from John Schlesinger’s 1969 film.  The following story has absolutely nothing to do with it. Weddings and funerals.  We only see each other at weddings and funerals.  And we tell each other the same old stories we’ve relived a thousand times together, warm and familiar blankets to wrap ourselves up in, memories and comforting thoughts.  We’ve done this all before.  It’s something that keeps us close.  And sometimes we don’t even realize a whole new story to tell is unfolding [more]

Endless Loop: Four Hearts in a Can

smogHave you ever had one of those songs that gets stuck in your head for days…weeks…years? Sure you have. These are the songs that always make the cut. The songs on repeat. We all have them. I have a ton. Welcome back to Endless Loop. “Four Hearts in a Can” by Smog Do you have that part of you that just wants to get lost?  To get in your car, to go out for milk or cigarettes, and to never return?  To pull off of the freeway and turn onto a lonely road that leads to…somewhere?  Or nowhere.  There’s this little piece of me that wants to drive into the desert, a beautiful, serene sunset to one side of me and an ominous, terrifying stormfront to the other.  Nothing in front of me but road.  And nothing behind me but dust and more road.  I’m not [more]

Endless Loop: To the End

blurHave you ever had one of those songs that gets stuck in your head for days…weeks…years? Sure you have. These are the songs that always make the cut. The songs on repeat. We all have them. I have a ton. Welcome back to Endless Loop. “To The End” by Blur My wife and I got married over 10 years ago in an outdoor service cheekily dubbed the “Lakeside Inferno” by one of my groomsmen, a party held on a 90+ degree day in September by a lakeside vista to cap off about 9 years of dating, which is a kind of surreal thing for me to think about.  So much has happened since then.  But you should have seen us.  Younger.  Skinnier.  Me with a stupid haircut.  We had it all.  And now we’re fast approaching two whole decades of being together, and if there’s been [more]

Endless Loop: Atomic

blondieHave you ever had one of those songs that gets stuck in your head for days…weeks…years? Sure you have. These are the songs that always make the cut. The songs on repeat. We all have them. I have a ton. Welcome back to Endless Loop. “Atomic” by Blondie Like a whole lot of folks I know, I used to be in a band.  I think we were pretty good too, not world shattering by any means, but we were definitely getting better before things went south and we imploded.  We played some shows, recorded an album, and filled our rehearsal space with so much cigarette smoke, it makes my lungs wheeze just thinking about it.  But one of the things we never did, and I’m regretful for it to this day, was become part of a larger scene.  We neglected to join a likeminded group of peers, freaks, and musicians with [more]

Endless Loop: Something Happened to Me Yesterday

rollingstonesHave you ever had one of those songs that gets stuck in your head for days…weeks…years? Sure you have. These are the songs that always make the cut. The songs on repeat. We all have them. I have a ton. Welcome back to Endless Loop. “Something Happened to Me Yesterday” by The Rolling Stones On April 11th, my dad will have been dead for ten years.  That’s a really odd thing to consider, as it feels so long ago, but also like this ever-present thing, an event I’d rather not have define my life, yet one that holds a permanent position within my psyche nonetheless.  It’s like it’s always just on the periphery.  And there are a million different things that can make me think of him every single day. That’s a good thing though.  I love to remember my dad, and I treasure each and every memory I have of [more]

Endless Loop: Video Games

lanadelreyHave you ever had one of those songs that gets stuck in your head for days…weeks…years? Sure you have. These are the songs that always make the cut. The songs on repeat. We all have them. I have a ton. Welcome back to Endless Loop. “Video Games” by Lana Del Rey Nostalgia.  I write about it in some form or another a lot here on Joup, as do our other contributors.  It’s this ever-present thing, a constant hum in our pop culture that surfaces in the music we listen to, the TV and movies we watch, and the books we read.  It’s in our advertising, our fashion, our cuisine, forever coloring our senses and perceptions in that rose-tinted fuzz of fond memories.  For better or worse, nostalgia is everywhere. I don’t think it was always that way, or at least if it was, it was more subtly so.  But for [more]


Living Nudes – My World Exploded

Joup’s Very own Thomas H. Williams
new album is out!